


Jump

by DrasticGloomyDemon



Category: IT - Stephen King
Genre: Asthma attack, Coming Out, First Kiss, Fluff, Losers Club (IT) Friendship, M/M, Post Pennywise, Richie hates Eddie’s mom, Richie is just trying to ignore it mostly, Richie is protective towards Eddie, Will add more tags later of course, but for now it will be, ingernalized homopobia, sleepover, they are crushing so hard on each other but don’t know cuz they are denseee, warning for lots of swearing, who doesn’t
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-29
Updated: 2019-10-27
Packaged: 2020-11-01 06:50:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 6
Words: 17,002
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20810870
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DrasticGloomyDemon/pseuds/DrasticGloomyDemon
Summary: Richie wants to help Eddie clean his head from his mother’s lies, so he starts to hang out with him and slowly teach him how’s to be a regular kid.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Heyyy, hello bonjour, uhh, hahaa...
> 
> Have a fic? It’s pretty much lots of moments between the boys, fluff I guess, hope you like.

“i told you I can’t do it!”

“what do you mean? Of course you can, it’s just a jump you baby!”

“I’m not! You know what I could catch if I accidentally fell there?”

Richie wasn’t even thinking about that when he jumped the green ditch on their way out of the woods, for him it was as easy as that, meanwhile Eddie could practically picture himself getting cut and infected by the probably gooey, virus infested dark water they just found for trying a different way to get out of there.

“you’ll take too long to jump here and your mom will think you got murdered in the woods by some serial “

Eddie looked slightly scared about that, even if it was just a dumb joke his eyes widened on a way that seemed cartoony.

“I... I’m gonna go through the other way like we always do”

“What!? That would take too long, and it’s already late to go through somewhere else, dark will catch us soon”

The smaller kid seemed to listen to the last part, his eyebrows arched as sign of distress Richie was familiarized with.

“you think so?”

Richie sighs, trying his best to not facepalm himself.

“Okay, let’s do this, you jump and I’ll catch you so you won’t slide on the mud or something, alright? Your pretty face will keep it’s clean”

A pause was made while Eddie thought about the offer and if it was some kind of joke Richie would pull on him and drop him In the last moment.

“you would drop me?”

It came out more like a question, not quite like on his head. Richie looked perplexed for a second.

“of course not Eds, I’ll catch you trust me”

He extended his hand waiting.

“mmh...okay”

He walked a few steps backwards and prepared to jump, his only option was trusting Richie for this.  
But the trust wasn’t quite on himself at the moment he was building the speed for it, stopping at the last second and due his own impulse his heels slipped on the mud. Letting a high pitched scream while falling face first into the water.

“Eddie!”

Richie looked down mouth open in surprise, he didn’t even got the chance to catch him.  
He made his way down as fast as he could without falling there too, actual worry building up at each second passes, till he was crouching down besides the water.

It wasn’t that deep of course, but the mud at the bottom felt like quick sand sucking him down, he extended a hand up and was gripping by his wrist.

Eddie gasped for air on a mix of panic and repulsion, Richie was looking at him with worry on his face, pulling him back out.

“what was that?”

“I knew I couldn’t do it! Why did you made me do it!” The boy yelled running out of air, searching for his inhaler in case of an asthma attack.

“what? You got scared even before making the jump, that’s why you fell, I couldn’t even try to catch you”

Eddie got out of the water completely, covered on green that floated on the top and mud all up his legs, his hands were shaking out of cold but mostly distress, already feeling sick with the projections of his failing health. He bites on the damn inhaler, he knows it’s bullshit but can’t help it.

Richie was using his own shirt to clean his face now, he stayed still on his knees over the dirt, this was the only thing he could clean himself with after all so there weren’t complaints on that.

“it’s the last time I go with you”

“you shouldn’t have stopped like that then, dumbass”

Eddie waited patiently till his face was clear again.

“my mom is going to kill me”

He sounded disheartened thinking about what Richie thought was an insufferable woman, that annoyed him the most, all of these insecurities were planted carefully by Eddie’s mother, that’s why he fell, and that’s why he have that damn inhaler on his hand and a bunch of pills with him.

“shower on my place then, I’ll go tell your mom you’re staying tonight”

“what about my clothes?” At least the annoyance was wearing off, slowly. Richie was feeling less tense now.

“I’ll wash them and give you some of mine, you can give them back later”

There was a silence while they stare at each other, on their knees facing each other, the sun was going down.  
Richie’s face felt hot while he waited for a positive answer, automatic regret appears on his mind, he couldn’t bear with the embarrassment of making an offer and not getting it accepted (or an humiliating declining). It made him feel stupid and he considered many times saying “forget it”

It looks funny how Eddie knew that it was a good plan, but stress was painted on his face about it, almost like he was going to cry about the whole damn thing, and remark why he was right in not wanting to jump into a sure death, or what he thought was one. Dramatic he thought.

“Okay”

Richie was at one of these weird time trying to be nice, he was glad Eddie didn’t point it out, otherwise he would have said something rude back as usual.  
They stood up again and climbed out of there.

________________

“Is this even properly washed? Did you do laundry today? Because I’m not catching some type of-

Richie lost his focus right there, his attention spam was short but Eddie made things even harder when it came to paying attention with how boring he was.

“I don’t have fucking AIDS or something you crybaby, just put the damn clothes on” He threw a sock in Eddie’s direction. 

Eddie looked at him offended, his wet face picking through the cracked door of the steamy bathroom with a bunch of clothes that belonged to Richie in hand. He got back inside and closed the door with a frown.

“For fucks sake...”

Richie dropped on his bed again and picked his comic, legs up and against the wall of his bedroom, lots of small marks already spreading from the many times he posed like that.

He thought the day got rough when his hypochondriac friend fell into the ditch, pond, whatever that they came across with back in the woods, but he didn’t knew it would be worse when he had to ride on his bike to Eddies house to tell the fucking Blob AKA Eddie’s mother that his lil angel was passing the night on Richie trashmouth house.

The venom on her eyes was obvious as she watched him get back to his house without letting her say something back like “why?”, if she knew where Eddie fell God knows what is she going to do to his friend.

He sighed, at least now they were home.

“Move”

Eddie dropped over his stomach like if he weighed nothing, an “oof” along with most of his air left Richie.

“Why?” He managed to say.

“Cuz Im not laying on the floor while you’re in your bed”

The boy stretched his arm across Richie’s chest and yanked the chips bag.

“Turn the TV on”

“I know you love me and all, but let me breathe first” Eddie sat besides him, finally removing his elbow from the ribs of his friend, a loud inhale was heard and Richie took the remote on his hand, turning the TV on.

It was odd to see him wearing something from his closet, he was still warm and his hair wet from the shower.  
He looks away.

“Should we get pizza tonight?” He offered.

“Sure”

“They laid on Richie’s bed watching TV for a while, there wasn’t much, finally coming across with some horror movie, they were laughing together about the bad makeup and obviously fake blood, Richie pointed out how they both being as young as they were still saw more real blood than the director of that mess. Then the protagonist decided it was time to kiss the blonde girl that followed him through the movie and Eddie made a noice of disgust.

“You’re grossed out by chicks Eds?” Richie said on a mocking tone.

“Yeah, that’s why I don’t wanna go downstairs, I might see you sister on my way to the kitchen” 

The comeback was good enough to make him smile.

“Kisses are gross though, you know how many bacteria lives in the mouth of the average person? It’s like kissing trash”

“Or your mom”

“Fuck you”

“Right, your mom would probably eat me alive if I ever try to kiss her”

Richie laughed while Eddie punched his side.

“You say it’s gross because you never kissed someone” he said once he stopped laughing, looking back to the screen where the man carried her girlfriend, cloying.

“How can it feel good when I know I’m getting practically infected?”

“Cuz nobody thinks about that when they’re in love you asshat”

“Like if you knew “ Eddie huffed taking a few chips and munching on them.

“You know how many babes I have kissed in my life? Hahaha”

None.  
Richie never kissed anyone and it was one more in the piles of secrets to never reveal to anybody, every time he thinks about it Bowers scream while exiting the arcade resonates on his head and he feels agitated all of sudden. No he didn’t kiss anybody, not just because he was practically unbearable or never shut up, or because he didn’t knew many girls, it was because he wasn’t thinking about kissing “babes” specifically... 

“I haven’t kissed anybody obviously”

“And you want to?” It slipped.

“I mean, have you ever uh- aren’t you curious? It isn’t popular because of nothing” good save, he thought while gesturing tot he screen.

Eddie looked back at the TV searching for words. and the light hits his face on a way that made Richie look for longer than he should.

“I guess there’s something about it, it’s just that.. I can’t control how gross it makes me feel” He seems puzzled.

“Bad stuff comes to my head when I think things like that”

Eddie goes silent when a tongue slides on the side of his face, he pulls away with a hot face and embarrassment, quickly wiping his face with whatever he had on that fannypack.

“That’s sooo fucking gross-“

“Consider yourself lucky, that’s the closest you’ll get to kissing, and even coming from me” he teased, pointing at his chest making his point clear on how honored he should feel right now. The voice on his head marks that that’s his closet too.

“But seriously, you think you would see the same if it’s someone you love or at least know well?” He thinks on a moment of delusion he would totally help Eddie out with his fear.

“I don’t know dude, why are you so curious anyways, haven’t you kissed a lot of chicks?” Now Eddie was mocking him, Richie always joked about this stuff knowing nobody would want to talk about it with him, but now Eddie was asking just the right question and didn’t knew how to deal with it.

“Well I- i guess yeah, can we call for the pizza now?” Now that’s definitely not an abrup change of topic right there.

“Yeah, but please don’t order it with weird stuff, mom says they use really low quality food on these places”

“Your mom says a lot of things, you want pepperoni?”

Eddie frowns for a bit and then his black eyes open like a puppy, he wants to try that one again but his guilt always interferes on his decisions.

“Come on Eduardo, chose”

“You think she won’t get mad or something?”

“She won’t even know” He assured putting a finger against his own lips.

“Mmmh”

“Hello?”

“Hey, How much for a pizza..”

Eddie shook his head suddenly thinking about what her mother would do. Stepping back in last moment like he did many times before.

“Yeah, with pepperoni please” 

Richie said that also thinking about Eddie’s mother, and how his son was practically all for himself tonight.  
He smiled seeing Eddie struggling with actual excitement and nervousness. He hates her for making him this conflicted.

...

Pizza arrived, Richie paid and went upstairs back to his room, the other boy following him.

“Go on”

The box was open and their dinner posed between them on Richie’s bed.

“Come on it’s not big deal, look” He takes one portion and lifts it over his mouth, cheese about to fall, and finally bites and good chunk out of his food.

“Did I die or something?”

“No, but you know how they don’t wash their han-“

“I eat from there all the time dude”

“What if I stain your pajama?”

“Does it looks like I would remotely care?”

“Do you see something wrong with it?”

He gazed down to the pizza, Eddie had an empty stomach, and he was nervous. Richie looked at his hungry stare and it was so obvious.

“Is your mom running here or something?” Not like she could tho.

“N-no..” he extended his hand and took a portion.

“Then go on! Live a little you princess”

They watched TV till it was late, Eddie didn’t realize, he ate two more slices and Richie felt proud for being the dominant voice inside of his friend and not his mom.

Next thing he knows Eddie is sleeping on his bed, the empty box on the floor, and Richie still pretty fucking awake.  
He lays down besides him, TV still illuminating the room, a random movie playing on it. Richie couldn’t stop thinking about it, he started to change through different movies till he stops at some cartoon. He watched with big eyes the whole thing and laughed a little in between, till the fucking rabbit kissed the hunter, he gasped, and immediately looked back at Eddie to check if he was still sleeping, he was thankfully.

He turns off the TV and lays on his side facing the other kid, he won’t stop thinks, he can’t.

________________

It’s hard to breathe, that’s his first thought when he opens one eye, Eddie snores over his chest and he closed his eye again.


	2. Chapter 2

“Open” he stood in front of the bathroom door with Eddie’s clothes.

“Just a moment”

“A granny is faster”

“Wanna look decent okay?”

“For who?” Richie felt weird for a second.

“Your mom” 

“Are you stealing my jokes now? Get your own material” He tries not to chuckle.

“Never” the door open and Eddie stands on his underwear, Richie reminds himself he saw that before and gives the smaller kid his clothes back.

“What did you use to wash them?” He smells the shirt like if not trusting Richie’s word, despite them being as shiny and clear as before the failed jump, they even smelled like perfume.

”What? I don’t know, who cares about that, they are clean anyways”

“That smells nice” Eddie said with honesty, Richie looks away.

“Of course, now close the door you exhibitionist”

The door closed on his face, he loves annoying him, it’s worth it.

“Is that fine or you’d prefer panties? I can go down and ask my sister”

“Oh shut the fuck up creep, get away from the door” he steps back, Richie forgot he was talking with him right in front of the door.

“Not like if I wanted to see your vagina through the key hole”

“Fuck off”

...

They were going back to hell, no, not the sewer, though they were going to a place with another kind of monster.

Eddie was sitting on the maneuver, Richie poking his head out to see the street against Eddie’s side above the hipbone, trying his best to not crash while enjoying the moment, his guilt was strong but it really got left on the background once he relaxed a little bit when Eddie didn’t say anything about it.

“Tomorrow is movie night, you’ll be there?” Right, the losers said they would go to Bill’s place to check a few new movies he got, maybe there would be a scary one he hoped.

“Of course”

“I’m not sure if my mom will let me this time, she get’s annoyed if I don’t spend enough time with her”

Richie frowns, annoyance threatening to mess his good mood.  
“Fuck seriously?” 

Eddie didn’t say a word but he wanted to go and it was evident, Richie wanted him there too, he would fight for it.

“Okay okay let’s think Eds”

“Hey don’t call me that”

“Let’s formulate a sneaky plan”

“What? Like knocking my mom out?” He mocked.

“That would work tho”

“Come on asshole”

“Okay uh..” Richie thinks for real now, and he might just fucking steal Eddie from his house “if I come and pick you up-“

“My mom will kill you on the spot”

“What if she doesn’t see me?”

“What do you mean?” They were at Eddie’s house, Eddie got carried away talking and didn’t realize till now, the bike stops.

“Haha, you’ll turn into a real princess”

Eddie jumps off the bike and kicks the wheel, Richie grins.

“What the hell are you talking about?”

“You’ll see, just wait for me” Richie kissed his cheek and got back on the bike, doing circles around the other kid.

“Bye bye Eddie spaghetti, see ya!”

Eddie looks at him while he leaves, something feels different, he isn’t washing his face like he would normally.

Richie was going back to his own home, his chest feels bigger and warmer, no regrets.

....

“Are you back Eddie? baby go wash your hands”

“Yes mommy” he’s pretty sure he washed his hands too many times today, but he wants his mom on a good mood for the question he had.

“Eddie honey come here”

He steps on the living room, his mom sitting on her usual spot like every single day.

“You know you can tell me anything baby, right?”

“Yes mom”

“And that I’ll protect you right? Because I love you” He nods.

“Is that kid Richie annoying you?”

“What? No no, Richie is my friend” Her mom’s eye twitched at the last word, Eddie knows Richie’s hate is as big as the disgust she feels towards him.

“He got me here on his bike, were good”

“You could have fell and broke your wrist or even a leg!” Eddie arched his eyebrows, instantaneously going into an uncomfortable and insecure state, it’s happening again and when she get’s started it’s truly difficult for him to not get a stomach ache.

“He was carefully mom, I swear”

“If I find out about anything you’re not telling me” she get’s closer and it’s intimidating “bad things will happen Eddie”

His hands are already sweating, but no way he’ll say what happened at the woods, Eddie won’t stop seeing Richie just because he failed that damn jump and got dirty. It was his fault.

“Mom.. I do want to tell you something”

“I knew it, what is it son” She smiles.

“Uh, tomorrow is movie night, with my friends. I want to go”

“Eddie you spent half of today at that awful place with that kid, no way you will go and leave me here all alone again”

“But mom, it’s at Bill’s house, you don’t dislike him-“

“You don’t love your mother?” She was making that voice, like if she was about to cry, now it was his eye twitching instead of her’s, it’s bad, this is bad “Because I do love you, I’m taking care of you Eddie, you could caught something if you go and don’t take proper care”

“Okay mommy”

___________________

Knock

Eddie opened one eye, he was about to go to sleep and almost made it till he heard something hit his window, his mind created a couple of monsters before he got up, thieves, a creepy homeless, a clown...

“Ptss, hey Eds” 

It was low but he managed to hear it, jumping out of the bed and approaching the window, a rock hits the glass were his face is and he flinched.

“For fucks sake” Eddie opened the window and looked outside to find Richie looking back from his bike, a wide smile on his face. Eddie’s bike is on the floor not too far from him.

“Hello princess”

“What are you doing here?” He hissed, his mother won’t hear him but every time Richie is around it feels like she hears ten times better.

“I came for you”

“...really?”

“Of course dumbass” Now we just gotta find a way to get you down here, he thought.

“You expect me to fly there or what?”

Haha, that would be funny to see.

“Uh, jump”

“What!? No way are you crazy?”

“Probably But there’s not much to do”

“I’m gonna break both legs”

“You have a better idea?”

No he doesn’t, and now he’s scared again.

“I’ll catch you Eddie”

“With those arms? I’m gonna kill both of us, this is ridiculous”

“I really want you to come with me” mmh that sounds gay, elaborate it“The guys are waiting for us, come on Eds”

The smaller kid closed his eyes while thinking, the distance between the window and the floor isn’t that big of a deal for any other kid, but he’s Eddie and he’s there panicking gripping his shirt hard enough to hurt. He wants to go with Richie.

“Eddie, i saw you do stuff before, like uh” think.

“I saw you walk on grey water, an-and win a rock war” Eddie looked back at him with surprise “and you kicked a clown in the face” Richie smiled at him adoringly, he liked to annoy the smaller boy, but loved making him feel capable of himself.

“You mean It?”

“Of course I do” 

Eddie sat at the edge of the window, looking at him and only him, this was a trust test for both now.

“If i die i want you to know your room is a mess”

“You think I already don’t know that?”

“Gross”

Eddie closed his eyes feeling the cool night hair hit his face and starts moving again, Richie extended his arms and waited, never concentrating more on something like right now.  
And then Eddie jumped from the window of his room landing on his arms and making him fall back into the grass. He’s hugging him.

They both are silent in shock, Richie looks down and Eddie is there in his arms around, eyes closed with fear and hands gripping his shirt with strength.

“Eddie” the boy open his eyes, now that he thinks about it they look pretty, almost like an owl but completely dark.

“You did it”

“Did I?” Eddie is over him, his voice comes out of breath, he get’s on his knees over him like if he didn’t acknowledge what he just did, and then starts checking for any injury but there are none, he got caught and all of the impact went to Richie’s back.

“You’re crushing me, that’s how you pay your savior?” 

Eddie giggles and Richie can’t look away, smiling at his friend feeling proud.

“Let’s get going”

“Yeah” 

Eddie helps him up and they take their bikes, heading towards Bill’s place.

....

“What the hell, are you both for real?”

“Did you made Eddie jump from his fucking window?”

“I’m glad you guys could come without broken bones”

The loser welcome them with questions and smiles, they can’t believe someone like Eddie jumped from a window trusting Richie, out of all of them he trusted Richie?

“I still can’t believe he convinced you” said Stan while claiming a spot on the couch, Bill was debating with Ben and Mike which would be the best movie for tonight.

“Me neither, I thought I was going to have an asthma attack or something”

“You didn’t? That’s impressive” Bev was sitting on the floor besides Richie, she smiled at him “also, nice pajamas Eddie”  
He forgot to take them off.

Eddie was feeling better now.

Movie started with some dramatic wavy font, of course they picked a scary one, and Eddie was already hugging one of his knees when the first jumpscare popped up. The only think he managed to get was that there was some kind of alien in some Antarctic base, it was good by the look on the face of the rest, even they got scared a few times.

On a particular scene Richie waited for the right moment and when the creature opened his chest and the rest screamed he took Eddie by his ankle and shanked it without much strength, still it managed to make his friend jump and scream like a little girl.

When he realized who it was Richie got a kick to the middle of his face.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is a little short, warning for gore and homophobia.

Ben kicked the small door to their underground house closing it, then covered it with leaves. The losers were walking together through the woods talking about what they would do at the arcade that day. It’s beed a whole week since they could hang out all together since the night Eddie jumped from his window.

“So?” Richie was in the back of the group talking with Eddie again.

“What?”

“Your mom suspected anything?”

Oddly enough, she didn’t and Eddie was glad but surprised. His mom didn’t hear him dropping over Richie from his window, neither heard when the boys helped him clumsily climb back into his room. Her omnipotent judgement wasn’t that powerful over him anymore but God it was difficult to realize it.

“Told you it would be alright” Richie said making an interpretation of his expression and hugging the other kid by his shoulder.

“Guess you were right” he admits rolling his eyes.

“Who could have guessed you would agree with Richie for once” Said Bev “perhaps it’s for good”

“Of course it is, they are noisy when they fight, unbearable” said Stan not even turning around to see Richie raising his middle finger at him.

They walk for a while like that, Richie kept his hand on his shoulder looking deep into the woods as far as he could, his attention was somewhere else though and he knew just by his silence, which when it comes to Richie, it always means something.

Eddie was getting used to this new attitude from him, but that didn’t make it less odd the fact that Richie trashmouth, unbearably annoying and humorous kid who usually picks him as a focus for jokes (and still does) is walking along his side looking away in silence as calm as he would spect from someone like Stan, not Richie, never Richie.  
He’s still as euphoric and compulsive as always, but not too long ago moments like this once were really rare, now it’s becoming more common and, as paranoid as Eddie is, he immediately searched for any posible reason for this to happen, none of the rest seemed to receive the same from Richie but him.

“You good?”

“Uh, what?”

Eddie looks at him “i asked if you are okay?”

“Im always okay, why?”

“I don’t know..”

“Are you worried about me, Eddie my love?” He pinches his cheek like he always does.

“Fuck off, I’m just not used to see you being so reflective, I thought you didn’t have a brain”

“Oh I have, and it’s thinking about the night I had with your mom”

“I’m gonna hit you so hard one day”

“You would never hurt the love of your life”

“Right, hitting women is for cowards”

“Hey fuck you”

They had a good time, or at least Richie did, he kicked his ass and the others got the same luck but that wasn’t any surprise for him, at some point he also won a bet with some teens that ended up losing their money, Richie had to mock them for losing so much so quickly.  
After having a good two hours of screaming to each other and jumping in place while smashing the machine’s buttons the losers decided to call it a day and parted ways.

“Bh-bye guys, see ya tho-tomorrow” Bill is the last to leave on his silver bike, leaving Eddie and Richie behind.

Eddie turns around to see Richie leaving on his bike.

“Hey Rich”

“Yeah?” He turns around, pink lips slightly parted, he absently thinks they are pretty.

“Can we go together?”

“Sure”

The two boys were about to make their way back when a small rock hits Eddie on the shoulder, he sees Richie tensing first, then a hand were the rock impacted turns him around and he’s face to face with some guy he can’t recognize, his friends stand behind looking with wide smiles.

“Hey girls how are you doing?”

“What the fuck?”

“I just wanted to see you again guys, what? were you two hanging out or something?”

Eddie remembers then, it’s the guy from the arcade.

“We’re literally friends you shithead, we hang out like friends, get the fuck off him” Richie says back without much fear or hesitation.

“Do you guys also do friend kisses?” The guy grins and does kissing noises, he feels disgusted by him.

Eddie tried to get away shaking his shoulder but the hand just claws more around it, Richie get’s off the bike.

“Let me guess, you two probably do lots of friendly things together, right?” The teen looks back at his own gang smiling like if what he just said was hilarious, the other idiots laugh with him. “I bet you suck his dick on a friendship type of way as well”

Eddie was panicking over this guy and his fucking strong grip, but right there he felt the need to turn his head and check on his friend. And he’s pretty much on his same situation but not as vocal, Richie was pretty closed about his feelings and had problems with their externalization, but right now Eddie could see his bottom lip shacking and his blown pupils looking at the teenagers, he was scared.

“Shut the fuck up, you fucking moron!” Eddie finally snaps almost falling while successfully getting away from the hand.

“Listen, I just came here for something you took from me back there so, where’s my money?” He said stepping closer to Richie this time.

“I already used it, but i think you can find it if you go through your mom’s underwear”

“You’re so fucking dead” Of course he would not just give back the money, that’s the easy way and he’s unfamiliar with it, he knows the consequences perfectly after so many times, even right now when a fist collides with his cheekbone and makes him feel like his whole skull got shattered. Then once again and again.

Eddie paled when he falls back first against his own bike, a hand grips his shirt and his face feels warm and wet, everything is confusing.

“Get off him!” His pockets are searched on and there’s no money on him anymore, that’s not what he cared about anyways, the strong hand goes away and two new but smaller ones are over him.

“Richie, Hey open your eyes please!” Eddie feels desperation crawl up his nerves when Richie’s reaction time extends more than it should, he moved his head like if he were sleepy, sniffing and huffing blood that splatters around his chin and neck all the way to his shirt.

“Please, please get up, we need to get out of here please, I’m scared Richie” Eddie’s hands cup his face and he flinched away from one side,the pain makes him open his eyes and the light it’s them, Eddie is over him and his eyes are watering while he tries to check for something inside his fannypack. There’s a clothe on his hand now and he held it like a zombie.

“Eddie..” his voice comes out more like a wheeze and his jaw hurts, he won’t be able to talk as much for now.

His friend is getting one of the bikes up, then he’s being dragged up and into his feet again, his knees are weak and threat him with dropping all his weight back into the floor.  
“Richie look, you might have a concussion or something”

“Yeah” he answered absently, he realized a few locks are dripping blood and his spine is curved, looking at the ground.

“Sit on the rack on my bike come on” Eddie helps him maintain stability while doing so, a firm grip on his arm helps him get back to reality slowly and the numbness starts to fade, he whines feeling an electric burn at his cheek.

“Hold the clothe to your nose Richie, like this” his arms are manipulated like if he were just a doll posing, he mindlessly held it were he was told and when the other boy get’s on the bike he wraps his free arm around his waist.

From that moment Richie is on a state of turning on and off, awakening and fainting for most of the ride, his head fell many times and at some point puke raised up his throat but never came out, he hugged Eddie with one hand and rested his forehead on his back making a bloody mess on his yellow shirt.  
At some point he could faintly hear the other boy talking to him, soft soothing words of affection and encouragement spilled from Eddie like if that helped him as well to convince himself it would be alright. Richie’s heart would hurt if he were fully lucid, instead he moves his head from time to ti,e, showing that at least he’s conscious right now.

“We’re going to your house Rich” He spoke up.

He nods against his back, smearing his blood even further, he made a mess.

....

“Wake up, we’re at your house” Eddie’s voice wakes him up, he thinks the sunlight makes his worried expression look pretty.

Richie get’s off the bike almost falling with it In the proses, Eddie get’s one arm around his waist and they are walking again but he can only see the street pavement. The door is opened by the smaller of them, and soon they are upstairs and he’s dropped over his own bed like a rag doll.

“Owwh ....Eddie, that hhhurts” he muttered.

“Sorry” he said from the bathroom searching for anything that could help with their current situation, making a mess but not bigger than the one he had done on his shirt.  
Eddie came back and dropped what he found along with the stuff from his fannypack on his side.

“Richie, sit”

“Im not a dog” He still does so.

“Can you see well?” Eddie was sitting at his side now, one leg over the bed, his fingers touched at random places around his face making it hurt.

“Yeas doctor” Eddie looks deep into his eyes and he looks away, he can see perfectly.

“Okay then, stay still now” Richie whined when Eddie started cleaning his face with some clothe, his nose had stopped dripping not too long ago and it made the job easier for his improvised doctor. He wondered how messed could his face be to make Eddie’s eyebrows arch like when he gets scared by something.

“Im going to disinfect the cuts, try not to scream”

“Be quick” His skin is cooling down with the blood gone. He’s getting lucid and aware of the pain.

Eddie pours alcohol into a cotton ball and Richie knows it’s gonna hurt for real.

_______________

“Is this Oh- this fucking torture done?” Richie’s face is covered in band aids.

“Yeah, i cleaned and disinfected all of the important cuts around your cheek and eyes, your lips have a few deep cuts though so I should apply an antibiotic cream”

“I should dip my head into antibiotics dude” he huffed.

“Okay” Eddie takes him from the jaw with one hand, a thumb ghosting over his bottom lip, and getting the cream over two fingers with the other   
“open your mouth a little bit”

“Woah so direct, want a kiss?” He raised his eyebrows and immediately regretted it when his whole face burned.

“Maybe if you had one bottom lip instead of three” the cream is spreading over the cuts and Richie hissed, shutting his eyes closed.

“It’s okay it’ll be quick”

“Hey Eds”

“Don’t call me that, what?” Almost done.

“Is..my face screwed?”

Eddie blinks, he was done with Richie’s lips and sat properly to take a look. Richie had a long cut over one of his eyebrows, shredded lips and lots of small cuts over purple and yellow bruised cheeks, but he wasn’t disfigured as he probably felt right now.

“You look rough but it’ll go away with time and proper care, you’re still not ugly”

Not ugly, does that mean pretty?

“Nice, I still can smash” he said making a fake expression of relief.

“Hahaha with who, my mom?”

“Mmh I don’t know if your mom is ever going to keep loving me after this, I’ll need to search for someone else that can love a badass like me”

“Good god that wasn’t badass you got your ass kicked, ridiculous”

“Yeah but at least it was me and not your baby face, aren’t I a gentleman?”

“I suppose you’re close”

“Thanks love”

“Shut up monster lips”

“Hey Eddie, nice red shirt”

“Are you sure you can see well, idiot?”

“Go take a look in the mirror”

A few moments of agitated breathing from Eddie while getting the blood off his shirt after, he’s back with a frown.

“Now my back is soaked, gross”

Eddie looks at the bed for a moment and get’s up, then starts to take all of the stuff he got out of the bathroom back to their place, moving fast like he always does, at some point Richie spaces out looking at him getting in and out of the bathroom. He can’t help it but revive how a few moments ago that same boy had touched his lips, at first feeling pathetic for being so touch starved, then that thought drowns by the warm inside his chest that made him smile like dumb.

“You okay there?” Eddie had finished with his task and was looking at him intrigued.

“Just thinking about how you look like an exasperated, probably divorced housewife cleaning my room”

“Someone gotta have the decency that you lack”

“We’re a good team, I destroy and you clean and yell at me for it”

“That sounds like a dysfunctional marriage” he laughed, arching one eyebrow with a smile.

Richie shuts his mouth for once when Eddie mentioned that, an odd feeling too similar to the sadness caused by a deception hits him. A marriage...

“You keep getting silent, something is going on either that or you got a big concussion” Eddie sits besides him.

“My head just hurts, that’s all nurse”

He walks towards his injured friend “Uh, if you ever want to talk about something It’s fine, yeah?” It feels odd for both to consider Richie’s emotional well being for the first time but things were changing and he was too along with them, growing to consider what seemed to hurt Richie, he saw it back there when the teenagers mocked him, he saw something he’ll have to look for next time.

Richie looks up when Eddie get’s off the bed and returns his gaze, the dark eyes look through him but a the same time don’t, they can’t, Richie had to keep a big secret away from the world and perhaps even his friends too, it was buried inside him and it would never get out, he won’t let it happen.  
Eddie isn’t wrong on assuming he had a fear, it was the fear of coming out as he actually is, and to him.

“Okay”


	4. Chapter 4

Eddie wiped his floor, got the trash out, cleaned his table including all the shit he had over it, and Richie was sitting there on his own bed doing absolutely nothing besides looking through lazy eyes, the tv sounds in the background but he’s paying attention to nothing more than the boy in red shorts scrubbing at some stain on the table.

“I can’t believe you got that stain off” 

“You’re lucky, Bill picked up the phone and said he will go get your bike” He said ignoring Richie, still focused on his current task.

“Dude look at my face and tell me I’m lucky” He mocked “my face looks like if i just got bitten by a shark”

Eddie turns his face on his direction with that serious, mildly annoying resting expression he had so many times, exasperated by whatever Richie had to say.

“You know things could have gone worse! don’t be stupid” He takes the broom he used a few moments before and hit him on the head.

“Hey what the fuck! Don’t fuck up my hair, it’s the only thing looking good i have left on me”

“You know how it could be worse!? What if you had your ass kicked alone? And there was no Bill to go pick your bike up, or me to fix you up?”

That’s true, but his mood is kinda shredded by today’s events and it’s not changing by seeing the good side.

“Okay okay you’re right Eds, I acknowledge your help, I do” he said just to end the argument quickly.

The smaller one goes silent, which is weird when it comes to Eddie fighting with him, Richie looks up and he is standing there with arched eyebrows, a hand on his hip.

“What?”

“You sound upset” he said, curious perhaps.

He is upset and Eddie found out this time, Bev would ask how he was from time to time, Bill would hit his arm and look at him in the eyes looking for an unspoken answer, even Stan would sit by his side and pat his shoulder, the point is Eddie never realizes, he’s too dense for that so, why now?

Eddie frowns lightly and approaches Richie, who was already looking in another direction, his fingers were hovering around the band aids around his face on a distracted way, feeling the texture, lips pursed. Eddie looks at them for a moment.

“I have an idea to make you feel better” He said with his high pitched childish voice, that means he’s exited.

“What?” He sighed.

“Let’s go get ice cream, it will numb your lips and they won’t hurt as bad” he smiled.

Richie thought about it, on a regular situation he wouldn’t but after getting his ass beaten the idea of getting out of his house again just a few hours after what happened is scary. But there’s a problem on saying no, Richie didn’t want to make it obvious that he was indeed, scared. So he nods and got up.

“Yeah sure, let’s go”

Eddie takes his hand and Richie forgot what he was scared of.

....

Outside was nice, nice but hot and Richie’s pale skin was already bitching about it. While he was busy looking like a cooked shrimp Eddie was taking it better of course, brown eyes resist sun better and his freckles were more evident in sunlight and his hair reflects a lighter color. He tries not to make it evident while looking at him.

“How are they?” Eddie walks with him away from the people, holding his hand and licking on what was left from his ice cream cone.

“I can’t feel them, it’s great” he’s even smiling, the pain of the ripped skin was completely numbed by the cold.  
Eddie was right, the day is better now, they walked under the orange afternoon sky all alone but that was probably the best part of it, they took a pretty much empty street on their way back to his house.

“Let me see” he stops them and Richie is getting dragged, his back is agains a cold alley wall and Eddie’s thumb is brushing against his parted lips. He couldn’t contain the gasp that left him and his eyes open in alert.

Eddie is closer to him than back in the house, and his face is red but he’s not sure if it’s because of the sun or the proximity between them, his quick gaze that went from his lips to different places on his face made him shiver but remains frozen in place.

“H-How do they look?” He whispered, pretty sure his hands are shaking at his sides on a pathetic way as he stood against the wall letting him do whatever he was doing.  
Eddie’s vanilla ice cream breathe hits his face and he’s so close his chest burns, trying not to move and look mildly collected. His heart is going crazy.

His hand traveled to his cheek and that hurts but it’s warm and soft and he can’t help it but lean on the gentle touch, “nice, I’m touch starved now” Richie thought feeling betrayed by himself in such a weird moment.

“Does it hurt less now?”

“Kinda”

“Richie” he’s nervous but not as much as the boy he was practically pining against a wall.

“What?” 

“Can i kiss you?” If Richie wasn’t already a mess he surely is one now, he can feel his skin getting hotter by second, an electric sensation goes down his spine and he’s pretty sure his brain just melted right now, proof of it a sudden lack of words or jokes that seemed to flow naturally at any moment.

“Wh-what did you say? What?” It’s just a mistake, he thought.

“I want to kiss you, can I?” Wide black eyes with blown pupils looked at his incredulous ones, he placed a hand on his shoulder “would that hurt?” 

Richie would pale but he had most of the blood of his body currently on his face.

“Like, like...on the mouth?” That’s obvious but he’s not registering what Eddie just asked, it feels like he’s just hallucinating a fantasy, it not real, it can’t be...

“Why?”

“I..” he thought for a second, like if the answer just got blown away by the wind.

“I just wanted to try it, I think”

“I thought you were grossed out by it” he knew it didn’t make sense, so why?

“I still am, I don’t know why but I thought about it just now...”

Richie lightly frowns, realizing two things at once, how close he was to kissing the current love of his life, and that said love just wanted to experiment, which is what kids of their age do but something hurts and a part of him craves it, he thought about it, dreamt about it and now he was letting go because it wasn’t corresponded, it would hurt him.  
His brain switched into negative again and every problem loses it’s true proportion, he thinks about how Eddie will get grossed out by him or laugh, suddenly a kiss is just a test, suddenly it will be just once and never again and it will break their friendship along with his heart, suddenly the streets are highly dangerous and his eyes search for hallucinated steps from people that could see them but it’s empty and nobody is there, suddenly he needs to go back home.  
His melted ice cream reaches his knuckles.

“Eddie not outside, it’s not a good idea” he’s nervous, scared.

“But we are hiding, are you okay?” An eyebrow arched.

“Let’s just go back, people are crazy here, you know it” Eddie steps back when Richie stops leaning against the wall.

Eddie opened his mouth but no words came.

________________

Back inside, back in Richie’s room and back at being upset. Eddie looked at the tv but his eyes weren’t seeing what happened on the screen, instead his brain worked like a projector and showed him again and again all of what just happened outside, it hurts and he’s not sure why or what but there’s pain somewhere inside of him, he recognizes the headache after feeling too guilty about something, too sorry.  
Richie was motionless by his side looking past the tv at some spot on the wall and it was depressing knowing they both were probably thinking the same, but couldn’t spoke it. Feelings like these were just another unspoken world.

He hates this and can’t bear with it, it feels like he teared something apart, something import for both him and Richie, and now he drowned on the consequences.  
Funny thing is, if he had the balls to bring it up and say sorry it would hurt less, but he’s scared and knows Richie didn’t buy the “I just want to try it” excuse he came with in the spot, he was exposed by himself and rejected by his friend he didn’t even knew he had feelings for till now. Hell he probably always had and never realized it was love.

Richie wasn’t doing any better, in fact, he was trying not to tear up right there because he would have to blame it on the innocent cartoon on the tv. He fucked up but can’t exactly tell how, at the same time he was just thinking how better things could have gone if he just said “yes” and it shouldn’t be a big deal for someone like him, but he didn’t because he got scared and now it’s awkward and cold, there was no hand over his own.

“Richie, it’s late so.. I have to go”

“Alright” he does look at him but Eddie can’t read that expression, it’s new, it’s bad.

This is awful, he kept repeating on his head while going downstairs, small noises came from Richie’s room. He opened the front door and came out feeling like he just escaped a home caught on fire and he was asphyxiating on the smoke, the fire came from the room upstairs and he felt he came out of hell and left someone behind in the burning room.

Even as he got on his bike it hurts, and when he was far enough something snapped and the street is blurry through his tears so he just hopes not to fall and break a leg or something. That’s what she would say, he knows she’s still on his head, even after dumped his last fannypack she’s still there. On his pocket when he reached for his last inhaler.

....

“Richie? I thought you couldn’t come” said Ben opening the door, looking at the mess that stood there covered on band aids.

“Plans changed I guess” he steps inside without saying much more, tonight they would hang out as late as they wanted and he needed to get distracted.  
He enters the living room and almost bumps into Bill, who left a small sound out when he saw his bruised face. He stood there for second scanning the other kid.

“Hi R-Richie..” Bill knew he had an accident, after all he was the one to pick the phone when Eddie told him he had to pick up his bike, but expected something less...brutal.

“Hey Richie” Bev pops from behind the sofa and smiles at him, she took a little time to do so but she managed to make him feel less awkward already, best part about hanging with her, girls are more sensitive he thought.

Everything went uphill after that, still suffering but from time to time he would completely forget about it and laugh with the losers, remarkably more silent though.  
At some point he and Stan were preparing some bowls with different trash food in each, he could feel his gaze on him but Richie didn’t complain, that probably what made Stan speak.

“What happened to your face?” He said, not worried about his tone, the tv was loud enough on the other room.

“I got beaten by some assholes, the ones that lost their bet to me In the arcade” he explained.

“Eddie did a good job, it looks less awful than what I pictured”

“I guess” a short answer.

He fills the last bowl with chips, takes one too.

“Can you help me get some pillows from upstairs?”

“Sure” he followed after him not minding Stan suddenly needing him for things he would do alone just fine.

He didn’t realize when Stan stud in the middle of the room not reaching for the pillows he said he needed help carrying but instead looking at him. When he did Richie dropped the pillows back in the bed.

“What?”

“Wanted to see if you need to talk about something” he said simply.

“Like what?”

“I can see you’re upset Richie, we all realized it as soon as you entered the room”

He’s silent, he needs this but it’s against what he shows himself as, what he built around himself. Richie is supposed to be the funny guy of the group, not someone that would need emotional talks with his friends.

“I got my ass kicked and lost the money, what did you expect?”

“You don’t care about the money a little bit, what’s the deal with Eddie?”

Richie doesn’t answer, just looks at Stan serious but comprehensive gaze, it sees through him and his facade. So annoying.

“He just...”

Stan walks closer while he fight with words.

“Did he do something to you?” He doesn’t mean it on a psychical way, Eddie is smaller and less strong than Richie, he would always win. But right now it seems like he asked the right question when Richie’s eyebrow twitch.

“I don’t wanna talk about it, don’t be dumb Stan I don’t need emotional support or whatever you’re trying to give”

“Everybody needs friends to talk, I am here for that and not to laugh about you having feelings, do I look like Henry?” Fair point as always, Stan always said the right things.

“I’ll tell you but you won’t tell anybody, just stop annoying me” pretending to be angry works neatly when hiding something.

Stan walks past him and sits on the bed, patting at his side. Richie sits there looking anywhere but him. 

“So, what did he do?”

Richie bites his lip and flinches when remembering it was cut.   
This is harder than expected and now his head shot him a bunch of warnings that didn’t make sense, but still affected him. What if this is wrong?

“I promise whatever it is I won’t judge you Richie” and now Stan is fucking smiling and Richie can’t help it, he feels a knot on his throat.

“E-Eddie Uh...he tried to kiss me” he finally said, his voice came out shaky and pathetic. It’s over for him if Stan lied.

“And What did you do?” He said not as faced as his exaggerated imagination pictured his reaction.

“I rejected him, we were outside”

“So you rejected him just because of that?”

“We could have end up killed or something”

Stan is silent for a couple of painful seconds.

“Did Eddie said something?”

“That he just wanted to try it out, but he told me he was grossed out by kisses before”

“I’m confused” he looks up, frowning to not look as sad as he felt, his eyes hurt “ Did I made the right choice saying no?”

“It depends, you like Eddie?” He’s startled by how naturally Stan just asked him if he liked his best friend, another boy, it shocked him more to see him smiling, knowing the answer he thought he could save to the grave was now known.   
Inside of his head was a fight between growing a pair and keep talking with Stan, or just get up and out of there as soon as he could...

“You thought he didn’t feel the same and just wanted to try it out with someone, not because it was you” Stan is just reading him at this point, a tear rolls down the side of his face and he wipes it fast.

“I..” he’s shacking.

Stan puts an arm around him, soon Richie finds himself burying his face on his friend’s shoulder, trembling and breathing unevenly. His fingers gripped the now wet shirt and he tried not to make a sound besides letting his hurried breath out.

“I know Richie” he knew since a long time, but also knew it was a secret Richie wouldn’t taint anybody to know. He’s actually surprised it wasn’t more difficult to make him say something closer to it as just now.

“Don’t tell anybody, please”

“I won’t, promise”

Time passes, he stops shaking slowly letting go of Stan, he haven’t said it yet, there were hints to it so in case this secret is told to anybody else he could always deny it, he didn’t confirm anything. But that also meant outing Eddie, saying they just talked about how he wanted to kiss him and he said no because he’s surely not gay.

“How do you think is Eddie doing?” He asked.

“Uh, I don’t know...”

“Richie, he likes you”

It can’t be.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This might have some mistakes since I haven’t reread it all, and cuz English isn’t my main lenguage

“Eddie bear, go open the door sweetie!” His mother called from the kitchen, too busy cooking.

“Yes mom” 

Eddie woke up not long ago, haven’t had breakfast yet. its almost midday and the last thing he expected when opening the door was to be facing an agitated but smiling Richie, he stands there with wide eyes looking at him with the best surprised dumbass expression he could have. Richie as tired as he looked even left a little giggle escape him.

“Ah hey-oh god, hey Eddie” he huffed hot air on the morning face of the smaller one.

“Why are you so red, did you got chased on your way here?”

“I was just nervous and went for a long ride, then came here” he speaks fast, they both did but Eddie was used to be the faster one.

“And for...what?” Why the fuck is Richie Tozier at his door at this hour.

“I wanted to know if you would like to watch a movie with me later today, I won tickets for a funny one, not spooky, I know you don’t like these” he practically radiated happiness and it confused Eddie so much he just stared for a while at his weird friend, who apparently couldn’t stop moving on his place bouncing on his heels. His gaze looks opaque with the light of the summer sun hitting his back and making shadow on his face, his glasses are kinda crooked.

“Uh, sure Rich” it takes a moment but he finally smiles back. They are good he realizes.

Richie steps forward into his house, into him and Eddie is rounded by slim arms for mere seconds, then the burning warm of the other body is gone but his hot sweaty touch, overwhelming, still lingers on his own skin. He stands on his door while Richie leaves on his bike, waving before leaving.

“Eddie, food is ready come here”

They sit at the kitchen table in complete silence, she takes the pan and puts an egg with two pieces of bacon on his plate, she served herself the rest, far too much for just a breakfast.

Eddie looks at his food for a few seconds, but he’s somewhere else, perhaps on Richie’s bike.

“Who was it?”

“Uh..” 

She won’t let you go. Don’t ruin it for his dumb smiling face he repeated on his mind.

“Eddie?”

“It was a joke” he said stuffing his mouth with food out of nervousness.

“A joke?” She left his plate to look at him, and Eddie feels his knees trembling quickly, feet hitting the floor repeatedly like a cartoony rabbit, it’s like if his mom could smell lies, and his fear too perhaps.

“I think someone knocked and ran”

He’s not hungry all of sudden, she takes a bite from the meat on her fork, her gaze lingered for a moment and slowly fell back to the food.

Eddie can’t help it as he goes back to his room, struggling to find the inhaler he himself had hidden on purpose. And when he finds it among his clothes he takes a quick hit from the surely empty inhaler but he feels like breathing again, tastings the residue of “medicine” on his mouth.  
He didn’t ruin it.

....

“What the hell are you doing here?” Her mom’s voice sounds loud through the house. Eddie immediately knows who’s she talking to.

“I came for Eddie, mrs. K” 

“Eddie have things to do right now, so you should go back to your own house” 

Eddie walks in with the best startled idiot face he could put on. Richie looks at him and then smiles, but her mother covers his view and her menacing eyes are over him. Now he understands why Richie joked about that look now.

“Richie? Uh I’m sorry, I have somewhere to go right now” he really hopes for the other boy to catch the lie on his eyes. He’s pretty sure he didn’t when his smile left his face and he now looks at him like a dog that got kicked out of nowhere instead of getting his treat. It made his chest tighter.

“Uh, but...didn’t you say-“

“Well, I...Yeah I have to give back a movie to Bill” Richie bites his bottom lip, something Eddie came to recognize as hurt with the time.  
He starts to feel the shame of being stupidly happy seconds ago creeping up his mind. He looks up when Eddie clears his throat and Richie’s eyes catch the other kid gesturing with his head to the side. He blinks a few times.

“I...I guess I’ll go then” Richie smiles, almost victorious to the intimidating woman.

“For better” she huffed.

“Bye mrs. K, have a good afternoon”

The door is closed without giving any answer, Eddie stud there covered by the shadow of her mother. She turns around looking down at him like an insignificant ant.

“Why did you said you had to give back a movie? Is that true?”

“Yes! I forgot to give it to Bill last time we met”

“Eddie don’t take too long out there, you know it’s dangerous”

“Yes mom” he smiles at her, lying.

....

Richie is sitting besides his bike, his back against Eddie’s house side. The grass there was kinda longer but he didn’t mind it at all as he waited surrounded by it oddly patient, this is kinda pretty, that thought makes him wonder if his face looks too hideous or if it got any better since the beating, will Eddie think something about it? Does it look less pretty if it even was before? Maybe he’ll place a hand on the side of his jaw again, even that would be enough for his starved heart.

His eyes open when steps sound coming from around the house, and then Eddie is dropping his own bike to the side and on his knees in front of him, smiling like when he does something brave and turns to look at him.

“Hey Edds, did you make your mom change her mind or what?”

“I actually lied”

Wait what? 

“Are you for real dude?” Richie straighten his back and soon is inclining towards his friend.

“Yeah! i did it, i had to” he said with a high pitch, arching his eyebrows but the smile remained there showing that he didn’t regret anything.

He lied for them to hang out. That will make Richie happy for a while, and he can’t help but think how Eddie could do that for him.

“Good job, I knew you could come up with something”

“Really?”

“You’re the only asshole doubting yourself here” he laughs when a hand shoved his shoulder roughly. They were laughing and it felt like peace was again there in their friendship.

“We should go, mom might hear us”

The air hits his face, he feels good for the first time on days since Richie freaked out, they both did.

“So, you know what’s the movie about?”

“Uh, cops I think?”

“How are cops supposed to be funny?” Bowers family flashed on his head.

“We’ll see...” 

“I can’t believe you were so exited to invite me”

“And I can’t believe you lied to come with me, I mean, aren’t I a bad influence for a clean nice boy like you?”

“Hey shut the fuck up”

“She would agree”

“She’s not here”

“Sorry for making you angry, mom’s boy” he mocked.

“I’m gonna kick you off your damn bike” his race is so red and Richie can’t help but smile genuinely, not like he always does when making fun of someone.

“Hey Eddie”

“What?” He snapped back, annoyed.

“Im proud of you”

“Uh, What..why?” Annoyance disappears and instead a confused, flustered expression takes place.

“The deal with your mother, you’re doing great” it feels weird to not be annoying Eddie while interacting with him, it’s even weirder to speak nice to him because he’s always watching out for a ridiculing answer that will make him be the center of attention for any further humiliation. Not like is he was talking with Bowers or someone similar right now, but Eddie is still a boy, and boys are cruel.   
The roots of his fears are stuck deep into his brain and it makes him generalize.

Richie remembers he was talking a few seconds ago and looks towards the other kid, and finds him looking away, a smile on his face.

__________________

They are already on their seats, popcorn between them and in total silence besides the protagonists of the movie talking and filling the room with different types of laughs, but his favorite one was from Eddie, of course. It sounds cheesy and makes him cringe to think about all of what he liked about the other one, but it’s uncontrollable at this point.   
Richie would laugh and turn around to see him react to the same joke that cracked him, looking at him from the dark like an idiot. He’s no way getting over him ever and his chest won’t let him rest about that fact.

“Okay this was worth it, thanks Rich”

“I was expecting something bad to be honest, we got lucky” his mind said he was lucky more due to the fact that he was spending time with Eddie, only the two of them.

Time passes, the movie ends and the popcorn is gone, their hands had tangled at some point that he couldn’t recall and they keep it like that even when Richie got up, Eddie follows him to the exit while chatting about what they saw.

“Okay okay That was great Richie, I would lie again for this” he said without hesitation between laughs.

“Oh yeah?” They stepped on the street and the sky was a dark orange that slowly turned maroon like the one that was almost faded around his left eye.

“I’d surely do” They stood there looking at each other eyes for a moment that wasn’t as brief as they would usually be, it was enough for him to take a hold of both of Eddie’s hands. His palms are probably sweaty now, and Richie almost yanked his hands away when Eddie’s eyes reflected a sudden worried emotion.

“What?”

“What time is it?” He said not letting Richie time to answer and taking a look to him own watch, his eyes open in fear when he sees it’s seven in the afternoon.

“Oh shit dude, mom is gonna actually kill me”

“I-it’s not that late?” 

“Yeah but she’ll get’s bothered anyways” 

“I have an idea, come with me we’ll get her a gift”

He rides behind Richie expecting, and when the taller kid stops at some store they get inside, his hand search for the other one, a sign of his nervousness.  
Richie walked through the store and stops at a particular place that made Eddie’s eyebrows fall in anticipated annoyance. Food.

“You’re a clown”

“Hey don’t say that” he said searching with his gaze for something specific.

“So what, are you gonna give my mom a fucking salami or what?”

“That could go two different ways and both ends with her satisfied and not annoying the he’ll out of you”

“Eww”

Richie takes a bag with a green tie bow, then hands it to Eddie, inside were chocolate cookies.

“You went to Bill’s, his mom got some of these and you saved a few for her too, what an incredible son you are!” He clapped while explaining the lie.

“You think she will just, accept this?”

“She’ll even hug you haha”

Eddie feels anxiety pooling on his stomach while getting back home. Richie decided to follow him home just to try and calm him down a little bit, when they get to the side of his house and the sun is hiding Eddie takes looks at the bag of cookies on his hands.

“It’ll go fine, and if she get’s angry just tell her we crossed on your way back”

“You talk a lot, that would make sense”

“Hey! That’s how you say thank you Richie?” He pretended to be offended and placed a hand over his own chest dramatically. Getting back on his bike.

“Ugh, fine” Richie’s eyes open with surprise when he’s yanked forward by his shirt and a fort kiss is placed on his cheek. He almost falls off his bike.

“Your glasses are crooked, idiot” Eddie smiles with sincerity “thanks”

“Uh s-sure, anytime Edds, see ya tomorrow?”

“Sure”

He watched with the bag of cookies on hand how Richie leaves, almost in a rush it seems.

You can do it, he repeated when he stood in the front door and knocked. Pretty sure he paled when the door is opened slowly and the big silhouette of his mother looks down at him with a deadpan expression, taking her time to make a tense atmosphere without saying anything.

“I.. I’m back”

“Why did you took two hours and a half outside?”

“I came across Richie on my way here” her mom frowns and Eddie keeps talking to avoid hearing some shit about how that kid is a bad influence for him, bullshit”

“But Bill’s mom had cookies and she offered me some...ah-and I saved a few for you mommy” he extends his arm, with the cookie bag on on hand and a twitching smile.

Her eyes widened and Eddie felt like either he’s gonna get yelled at for a solid hour, or hugged like Richie said, and when the bag isn’t on his hands anymore he’s pretty sure it will be alright.

“Good boy Eddie, you’re pretty considerate with your mother“

He was alright.


	6. Chapter 6

The movie was nice, hanging out with Richie was amazing as always and somehow, for still unknown reasons his mom didn’t get mad at him when he came home later that day. Everything was going great...

It’s been a while since Eddie last hanged out with the losers now, apparently because some virus that infected a lot of people for the last week or so, but mostly because of his mother saying he would caught it and get sick. But he didn’t want to fall for this again, too tired of her and the way she manipulated him so easily. He’s her son but also a kid, and kids need their friends.

“Eddie, i met a men just like you once, a lovely person” she looked at him from her place on the sofa, lazy eyes on her son.

“He didn’t have a mother like me, and that was his issue”

“Why?”

“Because nobody protected him”

He gasped, like the scared child he was.

“You’re sick too baby, and it will take too much to fix you, Eddie”

And he thought he was right when running away while she yelled from the other room how he will regret it when getting infected and having to take even more meds. Fine then, he’ll flush them down the toilet like the rest of these colorful pills.

And now he’s sitting on the cliff of the quarry with them, finally around decent people.

“You think so?” He hears Ben speak.

“Yeah look at this one, it’s better see?” Bev soft voice answers.

When Eddie looks up he sees both of them sitting at each side of Richie over a big log, they were talking about his face he assumed when Bev’s delicate finger traced a scar, since he was too busy fighting with his own mind he was pretty distracted that day to speak as usual.

“Guys don’t worry, I’ll always be a snack no matter how many scars I have” Richie said confidently making both of them laugh.

“You’re hideous” said Stan rolling his eyes.

“Hey you say that because your virgin ass is jealous”

“You’re th-thirteen Richie, you are one too” Bill said annoyed.

The bickering continues while they get up, ready to go after the time they spent there, maybe to their hideout now. But Eddie was still sitting there looking at the lake, he’s not feeling good at all.

“Come on Eddie, you coming?” Said Mike placing a hand on his shoulder.

“Yeah, I’ll catch up with you guys, give me a minute”

The other kid nods and walks away following the rest, now he’s alone with his thoughts.

And Eddie was kinda scared of that but didn’t want to tell the rest right now because, he doesn’t even know, he was just jarring it up to himself, not wanting to feel weak even if it was ridiculous.  
His mind is pretty fast just like his tongue, that’s the worst part of having a bad day, the thoughts were too many and they came too fast. Now her mom wasn’t the only thing tormenting him, but his fears too and it was painful, it’s painful to think about him catching the virus and suffering a slow death, and it’s painful to think about being in bed, a hospital one, while getting medicine administered through shots or even intravenously through a tin translucent tube.

He gripped his chest unconsciously like he always does when on distress, Eddie is afraid of many things and he’s mainly scared of sickness, but also dying, and it’s all painfully connected in such a sinister and manipulative way, he was afraid of sickness and decaying, and he was afraid of confronting his mother.  
What’s worse than knowing you’re dying and your mother will be there to say “I told you so”? The only thing he could imagine is living knowing there’s something running on his blood, killing him from the inside and It reaches a point were Eddie feels it’s hard to breathe, his throat feels like it closed. It feels like every internal sound, every crack of any bone or the weird feeling of a tendon coming back to it’s place meant he just snapped something like a vein by accident and he’ll die of an internal injury, the thought always drowned him and created ghost pains when he was perfectly fine. But the stories of people his mother knew and how they suffered, they are printed on his memory, diabetes without knowing, late diagnosed cancer, HIV... he’s full of random deadly knowledges a child should not have.

“It can happen to anybody Eddie, you gotta be careful or it’ll happen to you” she said inside his head. 

Eddie realized his hand is on his pocket placed over his now charged inhaler. And he was about to get it out when steps sound behind him.  
Richie stood there but he’s not smiling like minutes ago, maybe because he didn’t expect to come back to check on Eddie and find him having a meltdown over the fragility of life.

He approached and sat on his side so close to the end of the cliff, or maybe he was exaggerating.

“Eddie are you okay?”

“Do i look okay?” There’s no venom on his words, just anxiety.

“What is it?”

“My fucking head, it won’t shut up” he said with a wavy voice, hiding his face between his knees, hands pulling on his dark hair.

Richie’s palm is placed over his back, motioning slow circle on it, trying to soothe his nerves. He could feel how stiff were his limbs and it was so frustrating and painful.

“It’s okay Eddie” How it comes that Richie can be a complete asshole but when Eddie freaks out he’ll be trying to calm him down right away, every time Eddie isn’t alright he will be there. And it’s obvious he pretends to be rough and occupy just the funny guy role on the group, but even knowing that there’s much more to Richie’s personality impacts him.  
He’s not sure if it will still impede him losing his mind.

“I told the guys we will catch with them later, they told me Stan might not go to the hideout tonight”

“Wh-why?” He peeked a glassy eye from over his crossed arms.

“Oh, he said he had a headache, he just came off a fever he had yesterday” Richie said casually not knowing he just triggered his friend back into panic.

“Stan is like eighty five, he can’t hang out just because his head hurts, I bet he needs to go lay down and drink quicken soup or something like the old man he is” he then giggled.

“Anyways, i don’t know what’s up Eddie, but whatever it is I’m sure it’ll be alright, besides- Hey! don’t you dare take a hit from that damn thing” Eddie was pulling the inhaler out of his pocket with a shaking sweaty hand, eyes open like an owl and small pupils looked at nowhere in particular in complete shock.

“Nonono, drop that shit” Richie get’s a grip on the other boy’s fist and pulled down trying to get the inhaler out of the reach, but Eddie’s adrenaline made it harder and harder, and at some point he struggled with all of his strength, his hand covered the other trembling one.

“Richie get the fuck off me I can’t breathe!”

“Yes you can!” Their gaze would connect but Eddie was panicking and his eyes weren’t focusing on him like Richie’s ones did, they were wide open and his eyebrows furrowed angrily, and he tried to reach for the fucking inhaler pursing his lips on a ridiculous way that showed so much desperation.

“Eddie, look at me please” Richie had ran out of options, he was the stronger but scared Eddie wasn’t as weak as regular Eddie. So when the other one didn’t answer to his calls it was his turn to get stressed, and Richie did nonsensical stuff when stressed, fast solutions without consequences on mind.

And he applied one of those when he held his shoulder and pressed his lips to Eddie’s pursed ones quickly. The hair on his nape stood up and his face burns when he opened his eyes and Eddie’s shocked ones were completely focus on him, he didn’t pull away, just looked astonished with his eyebrows up.

Richie broke apart immediately covering his mouth with his arm, trying to mask his own shock with gritted teeth, Richie looks flustered but annoyed and Eddie feels like someone just slapped him.

“Fuck, cut it” Eddie noticed his empty hand then.

“Say bye bye!”

He yelled not giving time to any more protests before throwing the damn think as far as he could into the water.  
A faint splash sounds and Eddie is still on his knees with wide open eyes, not knowing what should he first complain about, and feeling like throwing himself in the water to cool his face down. Rociéis more agitated than him and still looks at the distance.

“What was that?”

“It’s called drug dependence, idiot”

Richie knows he’s not talking about that, but was Eddie really expected him to own what he just did?

“Are you two alright? I thought I heard Eddie screams” Eddie jumps back into his feet when Beverly walks in, Richie turns around and he realized they both were a red mess.

“Eddie lost his damn inhaler” he pointed at the smaller one.

“Y-you threw it into the water, you fucking dickhead!”

“Yeah so you technically lost it, right?” He smiles with that shit eating grin, Eddie wants to punch him on the face but that would open the cuts.

“You two cut the bickering, are you two coming with us or what? I told the guys I would wait for you two”

“They left?” Eddie asked, he thought they didn’t take that much time there.

“Yeah Eddie, come on let’s reach them” she leaves walking among the plants and disappearing, her faint steps soon gone and they were alone again.

“Let’s go spaghetti” Richie is already making his way out of that place without explanations and if Eddie knew how he truly was behind his facade he would understand that Richie wasn’t ignoring it or something similar, he was pretty much mortified and acting like he didn’t just kiss his best friend, his legs were weak as he walked through the plans .  
How the hell do you cover that? Oh yeah, throwing an inhaler as far as he could and making it look like that kiss was just some kind of distraction to snatch the damn thing from Eddie’s fingers. He himself didn’t knew how he managed to cover it, maybe Richie was destined to the world of performance.

_______________

The sun is hiding fast, soon it will be nighttime.

“You guys took so long, what happened?” Ben was the first to spot them walking to the threes.

“Blame it on Dickwad” Eddie said.

“Hey shut up” 

“You two just arrived and are already fighting, sweet” Bev passed them and Eddie almost laughs at Ben’s expression, the poor kid.

“Ah-are you g-guys getting in or wh-what?” Bill said from inside their hideout.

A few moments later the bickering transferred underground, and the losers looked at the two kids fighting for a place on the hammock tiredly. 

“You used it last time we came here” 

“Not true”

“Yes It is!”

“Go cry about it outside”

“I’m not crying, you fucking-“

“Cut it you two, I’m th-tired of your shit” Bill snapped basically representing all of the losers In a sentence.

“Just share it, idiots”

And they did, after some jabs and kicks to the face Eddie was at the opposite end annoying Richie like he used to do when they had to share it.

“If you kick me one more time I’m gonna-“ a kick to the side of his face abruptly silenced him, and then a more gentle pat made him raise an eyebrow.

“I’m trying to read, be quiet” he then placed his feet over the taller’s mouth.

“Ugh, I thought you were cleaner Eddie”

“I bet if I take your shoes off you’ll take that back”

“Probably” he smiled.

“If you can’t stand me get off the hammock” 

“I just can’t stand you kicks, are you a fucking donkey or what?”

“I would kick you all day long if I were one”

“Don’t You guys think it would be cool if we had a tv down here?” Mike interrupted them.

“Yeah, but i don’t think that’s possible” Bev answered, but could picture how great that could be.

“I have something similar that could do right now” Ben opened his backpack and stirred the stuff inside it, then pulled out something that looked like a walkie-talkie.

“What, are we gonna take turns playing with a single walkie-talkie? Good one” Richie said kinda bitterly.

“It’s not that, this is a watchman I got for my birthday, it’s like a small tv, look” Richie straightened his back, siting in the hammock with sudden curiosity shining on his eyes. Eddie turned to look at the weird grey box Ben held.

“Oh yeah? I’ve never seen one of these” Beverly leaned on his shoulder and Ben tried not to explode.

“It’s a Mega FD-500” he said, providing a fact that, whoever that gifted him that thing probably didn’t even knew.

“Can we use it?”

Ben seemed reflective for a moment, then he started to turn the little wheels at the side of the watchman, a few sounds came from it and soon the small screen had static on it. It just took him a few seconds to find the way for it to fade and soon sounds of voices came out along with some show, all of the losers started to round the small screen, looking with curiosity and excitement at it.

“Well, that’s kinda small” Richie said sarcastically, with an arched brow.

“That’s what my mom probably said” Eddie said.

“Is that a reverse mom joke? Oh my God” Richie said with surprise, then let out a loud laugh.

“It’s enough fh-for me”

“Yeah, put on something interesting”

They dropped all of the stuff they had for that night in the floor. Small blankets were placed around the watchman that was not too far from the hammock, where Richie had already claimed a spot and apparently Eddie couldn’t understand that, because once again he jumped up with his blanket in hand and made himself comfortable with his gaze glued to the screen not minding his friend’s protesting. It was kinda difficult to see it from up there but it was better than the floor.  
Mike had brought an oil lamp down there, the fire was small and it illuminated poorly, giving cinematic quality to their hideout. They passed each other the chip bags, Richie catches his with the face.

“Ugh, I can’t see” Eddie huffed, turning around and pushing him lightly.

“Let me lean on this side too” he said firmly.

Richie smiled teasingly at him, not moving an inch, but instead patting his chest.

He didn’t expect Eddie to shrug it off and lean over him like if he was a pillow, he catches his breath when the smaller one wiggled trying to get comfortable, both of his hands placer above his chest and down his cheek while he watched the noisy show Richie completely forgot about.

“That’s pretty cute”

“Cats aren’t cute, they are evil”

Oh, so it was a cartoon about cats. Richie tried to focus on that to make his heart beat a little slower, but it was so difficult with the weight over him, with the two hands placed over it while it jumped inside his chest nervously. He was helpless.

Eddie turned his face up probably having an unflattering angle of Richie’s face like that, and whispered for only both of them to hear.

“Do you feel alright?”

“Why you ask” he whispered back, glad the dark could mask his shame.

“Your heart is pretty loud like, are you sure you feel fine?”

“Might be having a stroke, not big deal” he said placing a hand on the small of Eddie’s back. This made the kid put on a worried yet annoyed expression.

“Don’t be dumb, your side should be numb” he said confidently, but couldn’t help to flick his eyes quickly to meet his gaze “You’re not numb, are you?”

Richie left a soft laugh out, seeing how worried the other kid got by other people was more enjoyable than when he worried about himself. Eddie was really considerate about safety in general, that was one of his best qualities he thought.

“I’m fine, I was just thinking about something”

“What?”

“Your mom only can make my heart beat like this- Haha agh okay sorry” Eddie smacked his face loudly, even Beverly turned to see what was happening.

“Okay okay sorry, though You know my taste is better”

“Yeah, you seem to like imaginary people”

“Damn, Like you” They were looking at each other for a moment, then Eddie finally giggled.

“Fuck you, dude”

“I didn’t catch shit from the movie”

“It isn’t a movie, it’s a show” he said from his comfortable position.

“It’s about cats and they are fighting with stray dogs”

“Oh” he didn’t care about that show at all.

Richie lied looking at the faint fire that hangs away in a corner, some bugs flew around it.  
He’s pretty sure they have been watching that for the past hour, the woods were noisy at night and the crickets were almost louder than whatever was currently going on in the watchman. It always took him more time to fall asleep when they hanged out here at night, maybe because of the spiders and their constant little noises. Bill was the last one fall asleep, turning off the watchman.

He can hear the breath of the losers, and the soft one of Eddie, who currently lays passes out over him, warmly hiding below his blanket.

“You’re not that heavy”

“Of course im not” Richie cringed when Eddie, who seemed fast asleep answered as soon as he always does.

“I thought you were sleep”

“I was about to be, but you opened your mouth”

“Be nice with your pillow”

The silence fell over them, and for a second he thought Eddie actually fell asleep after saying that.

“The guys said your face is doing better” it was almost gone, there were some pinkish traces over his skin, some fain, some almost vibrant. The worst was already gone, as the purple marks were 90% faded away.

“Yeah, i think so, I’m still three lips monster though”

Eddie’s irises looked like black holes in the dark, they even seemed to have deep and it made his expressions so much more readable in the dark with the contrast of the white of his eyes. Richie could see right then how these eyes looked down at him, scanning his face like so many times. He was used to that.

Eddie looked at him from over his chest like an owl in the night, and if it wasn’t for the dark Richie would probably panic like his heart did an hour ago, this was a more comfortable approach, maybe invincible was his type like the other kid said.

“I can’t sleep” Eddie said, with restlessness.

“It’s pretty noisy here, yeah...”

“Mmmh” the one on top sighs, fiddling with his fingers. 

Richie was glad that the other boy was on top of him, since of course he forgot his blanket, it’s warm and he’s surprised he didn’t fall asleep by now with how cozy it felt.

“Were you lying the other day, when you said you have kissed someone before?” He said as casually as he managed, feeling drowsy already.

“What, you don’t believe me?” Richie smiled.

“Fuck no”

“What about your-“ 

“You and your overused mom jokes can kiss my ass” 

Richie would play offended but the firm statement made him giggle.

“So I was right, you haven’t”

Richie was silent, but shook his head smiling, understanding Eddie and him were in the same page and feeling confident enough to not lie. He wasn’t that big of a liar, actually, he barely lied but he almost didn’t hide anything from Eddie. Which sometimes made things difficult.

“Haha! I knew it” His jaw clenched and he had to look away to not lose his cool.

“Come on, it’s not that obvious”

“You freaked out when I asked you about it”

“What were you expecting, you told me it was gross” he defended himself, feeling kinda like a cornered animal. If Eddie was an owl then Richie was a mouse right now.

“Well, Yeah but it’s not that I like to think that way” 

“You would have regretted it”

“Why? It isn’t as good as you said?”

“Because, why with me?” Eddie didn’t answer right away, instead the silence drowned the whole hideout for what felt like minutes more than a few seconds.

“Out of all people, I think I would believe on you to try something like that” Eddie spoke slowly, thinking carefully “I can’t think about kissing Bill, or Mike, not even Beverly. That’s kinda scary, to not want anything while the rest do”

“What about Stanley?” 

Eddie made a frown, analyzing.

“I could imagine that with Stan, but I don’t think he’s the type that likes uh, kisses his friends and stuff”

“Yeah, that’s true” he said, looking down from the hammock at the rest of the losers, snoring.

“I...I could imagine that with Stan as well” he admitted with a low voice, almost inaudible for Eddie, but he still managed to hear it, and when he registered what the other kid with ashamed eyes said he felt like made out of stone, immobile.

“Really?”  
Eddie trusted Richie, that’s why he told him about his mother, and his fears, and now about what he thought of Stan. Richie had to agree, partially because it was true, he saw their friend attractive as well, but also to show Eddie he wasn’t alone on that train of thoughts.

“Why do we think the same? Why like that?”

“I don’t really know Eds” He sighs, looking away.

It feels like there’s a hole on the middle of his chest and it makes it hard to breathe, that along with a sudden headache, Richie had those when feeling pressured.  
What does all of this means, yeah they both could kiss Stan, so what. It feels like getting gifted a big amount of money but not knowing what to do with it.

“Don’t tell anybody” Eddie spoke again with serious eyes that promised to choke him if he didn’t say yes.

“If you don’t tell what I said either” he said carefully.

“Deal”

Richie gave a wide smile to the smaller kid, which was a mistake because he felt the clear feeling of the skin on his lips ripping apart again, followed with the familiar warm metallic trace of blood down to his chin. And he felt tempted to smile again when Eddie let out a gasp and his eyes widened, but only managed to wince at the stinging pain.  
And he saw how his pupils contracted when a drop of blood stained his T-shirt.

“Oh my god, Richie” he hissed, trying not to wake up the rest. 

Eddie struggled to move while the hammock shakes, and he ended up laying chest to chest with Richie, then cupping his face he forced his young sight on the darkness.

“Ow ow ow, Eddie” he hissed in pain, looking at Eddie with soft eyes.

“Okay okay, it’s not that bad. The cut on the middle opened but the other is fine”

“Uh, okay doctor”

“Does it hurt?” His worried gaze went up to meet Richie’s one. And the similar scenario made his hair stood up, it brought him back to that alley with an ice cream on his hand and Eddie’s thumb on his bottom lip. But this time, hidden in the dark of the night a good part of that fear evaporated.

“I’d like some ice cream right now” he said plainly. Eddie was still on his place for a moment when he said that, his thumb slowly moved over his cheek to rest at the healed side of his lip, his mouth on a tin line and eyes looking at some memory that got triggered more than the kid in front of him. Richie noticed how Eddie did this a lot, he would think about something and space out, not really looking outside of his own “mind pictures”.  
His eyebrows lowered on something that resembled concentration, like he just saw something unbelievable and can’t really tell if it was real or just made up by his mind. He looked with intense eyes at Richie, and if it wasn’t such an oddly serious moment he would laugh at that expression.

“Richie”

“Yeah?”

“Can i... is it alright if we..” his breathe hits Richie’s face, and his heart tried to escape through his throat.

“Kiss?” He finished for him.

“Yeah”

“It’s not like i want to demotivate you, but I’m bleeding, aren’t you disgusted?”

Richie is partially teasing, yeah, but also making sure Eddie was sure of what he was about to do. Avoiding any uncomfortable possible outcome, he didn’t need to make Eddie’s first... second experience bad, even if he wanted him, he also needs Eddie to like it too.

“Uh..”

“I can see your mom whispering in your shoulder” he said almost singing the sentence.

“Who’s on your other shoulder telling you to do it despite everything?” he hugged Eddie by his waist to get more comfortable, pressing them together.

“You on a ridiculous devil suit, probably telling overused jokes” he said with exasperation but a smile on his face.

The giggles continued till Ben snored loud enough for them to completely shut up. Eddie turned to look at him slightly startled. For a moment they both were looking at each other, agitated breathes mixed in the small space between them and the atmosphere feels heavy, unreal. 

“I don’t have my stuff to disinfect you...”

“Nope”

“And im sure nobody here had the common sense to bring something useful like alcohol or hydrogenated water” 

“Mhmm” Richie was laying there watching the other kid struggle, choosing between what he wants over what his hypochondriac, mother influenced side would. And he’ll just wait for him to pic. He feels surprisingly relaxed and, perhaps it’s because he believes on Eddie, even if it isn’t the decision with the best outcome for him, at least the love of his life analyzed at some of kissing him.

“Fuck” Eddie finally said, eyebrows arched yet together expressing frustration and anger.

“You think I’m gonna kill you Eds? Look at me”

Eddie did so, with a remorseful stare that reminded him of a dog being shouted at, like if he was being lectured by her.

“You think I look sick? My veins have blood as healthy as yours Eddie, I’m not dying or rotting or whatever You’re evaluating right now” 

The smaller brunette listens avoiding eye contact, but examining him. Like corroborating What he said.

“Hell, I don’t have aids”

That was it, Eddie looked at him with guilt, knowing full well he found a very specific fear just now, a pretty real one.

“Do what you want, you asked me for this. Whatever you do I’m okay with it”

“Yeah.. i know, I’m sorry for being this complicated”

“It’s the way you are and I have my flaws too, they are just cooler than yours” he let out a small laugh.

“Okay...” he said more for himself than Richie.

“Okay! Yeah, let’s uh, let’s do this” Richie’s eyes open in shock, and when Eddie placed both hands on his face he melted in the touch. He got closer and Richie realized how beautiful his eyelashes were in the dark as well as in the sunlight, they gave so much expressiveness to his eyes.  
Suddenly he felt how the blood was being cleaned off his chin with Eddie’s own bare hand. Disgust but determination on his face.

“Just kiss me already, for fucks sake”

“I’m trying to clean as much as I can” Eddie hissed.

“Okay, hands off let me do this” their silhouettes moved in the dark and Richie sat on the hammock, Eddie had arched his back to adapt the change of position and ended up siting on Richie’s legs, and he looked so confused.  
Then Richie took his face and did both of them a favor finally connecting their lips together, and he’s not sure how it looked from outside of his perspective, but he felt like it was perfect, the way he closed his eyes and everything disappeared but Eddie, his presence in the form of a soft kiss. His ripped lips meth soft ones and he knew practically instantaneously it was right, and realized how much he actually craved it, needed it. He loves Eddie.

It felt like a while, and when Eddie pulled off with a wet noise Richie followed the movement, missing it.

“Oh my God” Richie said breathlessly.

“That’s...different than what I expected” Eddie said on a low, careful whisper. Richie could only see black ink like eyes, big blown pupils met his.

“But good?”

“But good” he echoed, sure about it. Then he pressed his palms at Richie’s shoulders, making him lie down again.

“Nice lipstick”

“What?”

Eddie touched his own lips and clenched his jaw when the blood of his friend, now smeared on his mouth, stained his fingers. And he couldn’t help it but feel the metallic taste now, getting a moment of self consciousness.

“You look good”

“You’re so damn weird” he said wiping his lips with his wrist.

“Yeah, i am. Now kiss me again”

Eddie did so, and this time he could feel Richie’s hands hugging him tightly by the middle, and he placed his on the sides of the others face.  
He felt the warmth of the blood coming from Richie’s mouth, the smell and the taste, but it wasn’t enough to make him back off, he just frowned a little, feelings his eyelashes tickling the others cheeks. This isn’t that disgusting... 

They broke apart again between small pecks, he ended up gripping Richie by his T-shirt, his breath was quick and his face hot like summer.  
Eddie came to the conclusion that kissing wasn’t that gross, it actually was pretty damn good and without realizing it he was wanting more again.

“Be careful, it really stings” Richie whispered.

Eddie decided to try other way, and started to give small quick kisses on Richie’s top lip, and somehow it was even better and he kept doing it again and again.

“Woah, okay...okay give me a moment” Eddie opened his eyes again to meet Richie’s incredulous gaze. 

“I never thought you would be so into it” he said out of breath, with a weak smile.

“I never thought it would be like this” 

“So, this is okay?”

“Yeah, I’m okay with kissing you” after finishing that sentence he frowns.

“Actually, I think we should keep doing this...just”

“When we are alone” he completed.

“Yes”


End file.
